Saiko means TERRIFIC!!!

Assalamualaikum and hye people.

I always wonder, those cheerful people, are they having beautiful life? Do they have any problems to deal with? It seems not!
I always think that I am a person who have the misery...always having tears pouring down on my cheeks.
People said that this life is just like a wheel, sometimes it would be above, and sometimes, it would be at the bottom (literally translated). Even for those happy people. But, yet I cannot truly believe it until...

"It's a convenience to look at you, always smiling. =D "

That was my friend's. Her words made me ponder.
Yeah...I have problems, but people don't see me as a 'moody' person.
Even myself, I dont believe that I am that cheerful.
This made me
'hmmmmm'
Those cheerful people...hye!! :)

You know what...I am in the process, process of healing.
Psycho.
I am not insane of course.
Just personality disorder.
Alhamdulillah, with Allah wills, I am changing.
More confident! More towards my true self.

But right now, even to my classmates, I think I am little bit cold.
This made me
'hmmmmm'

There are reasons. hmmmm.
But then,
I want to treat people equal.
I meant, I dont want to discriminate people.
To girls, to boys....it must be equally treat. (Batas tu still ada lar, ohohoii)

lol

My high school life and my pre-university life....
I like the second one more.
I think I am more in being human there.
Alhamdulillah...
and I am sad when looking at my schoolmates from previous school (not all)
I still love the memories we have created there, those best friends of mine. Those are sweet memories.
But the others....hmmm.

It's because of me...I used to be the 'other person'.
Not myself.

It's terrifi isnt it? SAIKO!!!!

NOTE: this post have subliminal message muahaha
p/s : that SAIKO word from Japan Language. Do not know the actuall spelling though..hihi